PLEASE BE AWARE OF FAKE PROFILES ON SOCIAL NETWORKS

NAME AND SHAME

FAKE PROFILES

Please be aware to fake profiles on the internet. Often the quality of their photos are very poor and they are extremely small and common sometimes the photo format is one not often or rarely used for uploading photos, this is because they have been copied and pasted from elsewhere on the net. I had the fortune lol if you could call it that LOL! to meet someone who uses the name Samuel but if you ask him to prove it is him and he wont be able to. He will always have some excuse, his cam is broken, his computer needs repairing, he cant plug his camera into his computer as the lead is broken or lol his CPU needs repairing or he needs help from the Tech guy at work. Based in Bahrain lol! need I say more of his origins. I have spoke to him on the phone and his accent does not ring true, nor does his vocabuary it certainly does not fit with his nationality and where he has lived. As a Medium I saw right through him. I have and many others out there have come into contact with this character. If someone is genuine, there will be no hesitation to show their face on cam or send you a photo with a newspaper showing a current headline and today's date failing that holding a card with their name and date. One last thing be very wary of someone who asks you for naughty photos of yourself or asks you for cyber sex, the genuine friend wont ask you such requests. I wasn't fooled by Sam here but many have before and others will in the future, so listen to your intuition.

Like the cartoon above of the dog on the internet, you cannot be sure to whom you are chatting to. If you start to develop a deeper relationship with anyone on the net always ask for proof.

- See more at: http://www.astridestella.org/2009_08_01_archive.html#sthash.MI0BcdVF.dpuf

NAME AND SHAME

FAKE PROFILES

Please be aware to fake profiles on the internet. Often the quality of their photos are very poor and they are extremely small and common sometimes the photo format is one not often or rarely used for uploading photos, this is because they have been copied and pasted from elsewhere on the net. I had the fortune lol if you could call it that LOL! to meet someone who uses the name Samuel but if you ask him to prove it is him and he wont be able to. He will always have some excuse, his cam is broken, his computer needs repairing, he cant plug his camera into his computer as the lead is broken or lol his CPU needs repairing or he needs help from the Tech guy at work. Based in Bahrain lol! need I say more of his origins. I have spoke to him on the phone and his accent does not ring true, nor does his vocabuary it certainly does not fit with his nationality and where he has lived. As a Medium I saw right through him. I have and many others out there have come into contact with this character. If someone is genuine, there will be no hesitation to show their face on cam or send you a photo with a newspaper showing a current headline and today's date failing that holding a card with their name and date. One last thing be very wary of someone who asks you for naughty photos of yourself or asks you for cyber sex, the genuine friend wont ask you such requests. I wasn't fooled by Sam here but many have before and others will in the future, so listen to your intuition.

Like the cartoon above of the dog on the internet, you cannot be sure to whom you are chatting to. If you start to develop a deeper relationship with anyone on the net always ask for proof.

- See more at: http://www.astridestella.org/2009_08_01_archive.html#sthash.MI0BcdVF.dpuf

FAKE PROFILES

Please be aware of fake profiles on the Internet often the quality of their photos are very poor and they are extremely small and common sometimes the photo format is one not often or rarely used for uploading photos, this is because they have been copied and pasted from elsewhere on the net. I've come across many of those fakes over time and like all fakes if you ask him/her to prove it is him/her and he/she wont be able to. He/she will always have some excuse, his/her cam is broken, his/her computer needs repairing, he/she cant plug his/her camera into his'her computer as the lead is broken or lol his/her CPU needs repairing or he/she needs help from the Tech guy at work. Often they are based in the middle east or Africa (West Africa is a common origin of these fake profiles).  Even  speaking to such profiles on the phone often the accent does not ring true, nor does the vocabulary and often does not fit with his/her nationality and where he/she is suppose to live. As a Medium I see right through these fakes. If someone is genuine, there will be no hesitation to show their face on cam or send you a photo with a newspaper showing a current headline and today's date failing that holding a card with their name and date. One last thing be very wary of someone who asks you for naughty photos of yourself or asks you for cyber sex, the genuine friend wont ask you such requests. I'm not fooled by these fakes but many have before and others will in the future, so listen to your intuition.

Like the cartoon above of the dog on the Internet, you cannot be sure to whom you are chatting to. If you start to develop a deeper relationship with anyone on the net always ask for proof.

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HATE ON SOCIAL NETWORKS

I have never seen such venomous twaddle spouted on social networks before as in the recent few days. We all have a right to our own opinions and that's fair enough, we all have a right to like or dislike situations or people but I feel we do not have a right to hate people we do not know personally. No one is perfect especially these people who spout hate and they would do well to remember this. Many of these people profess to be Christians and if that being the case they would do well to remember what the bible says on  this, i.e. let those who have not sinned cast the first stone. All holy books in all religions teach we should love and respect one another and I defy anyone who says this is not the case. For those haters who profess to believe their opinions are correct and who feel they have the right to hate those they do not know personally, they are not perfect themselves they are hypocrites and shame on them. As I said before we all have the right to opinions, some of those opinions will be wrong, some will be correct in others eyes, but we do not have the right to foist our beliefs and opinions on others, especially when it comes to spreading venom and hate.

I am not perfect, you are not perfect, perfection does not exist on earth but only in God's kingdom, whoever your God is. Earth is our classroom, we are all incarnated to learn, to learn what is right and wrong, to learn to respect others and to learn, humility, empathy and compassion and to grow spiritually. Hate is not growing, it's going backwards, and belongs to that place where greed, envy, bigots and disrespect reside. Hate only harms your own soul, it twists you up inside as does carrying a big chip on your shoulder.

To sum up: we do not have a right to spread hateful opinions on situations or someone where we have no personal experience off. Shame on anyone who does this and I pity you for the Universe will teach you a tough lesson and I don't envy that lesson you're going to receive.

SOCIAL INTERACTION OF SOCIAL NETWORKING SITES

An interesting article this one I found on Yahoo, I can't answer for what others think but before the researchers generalise, I think they need to research fully before the researchers make their judgements. Social Networking is a highly effective tool for marketing, in fact the vast majority of major companies as well as small traders etc and other media have a presence on Facebook. This is why I am there, as I can interact with potential clients both for the service I provide and as customers/readers of my books and I have both a private and a fan page. 

I have seen the type of personality they talk about though, they like to create drama for the sheer sake of it, so they can generate attention and say 'poor me'. They have also been known to state they may have cancer, or some other serious illness, I have come across this. Some like to be what I would describe Lord or Lady Bountiful! whereby they will foist their religious beliefs onto others and state they will pray for you, and constantly copy and paste religious messages on others pages, these types like the attention of being do gooders, though they are often the biggest hypocrites that walked the earth. Another trait is they paste on their status, "If you don't interact with me enough I will delete you off my page". Else they will state, "I'm house cleaning, if you want kept on my page say so", this is often the same type who post the religious messages. Is there any need to state this at all? if they have noticed that they dont have as many interactions from so called friends and its clear they are not likely too, there is nothing to stop them hitting the delete button without the song and dance about it. As I see it, if they have to state this publicly then it is a form of attention seeking. But before they do, they should remember interaction is a two way process and many lead very busy lives and don't always get the time to be socially as active as they would like.

ARTICLE BELOW FROM YAHOO

Researchers have established a direct link between the number of friends you have on Facebook and the degree to which you are a "socially disruptive" narcissist.

People who scored highly on the Narcissistic Personality Inventory questionnaire had more friends on Facebook, tagged themselves more often and updated their newsfeeds more regularly.

The research comes amid increasing evidence that young people are becoming increasingly narcissistic and obsessed with self image and shallow friendships.

The latest study, published in the journal Personality and Individual Differences, also found that narcissists responded more aggressively to derogatory comments made about them on the social networking site's public walls and changed their profile pictures more often.

A number of previous studies have linked narcissism with Facebook use, but this is some of the first evidence of a direct relationship between Facebook friends and the most "toxic" elements ofnarcissistic personality disorder.

Researchers at Western Illinois University studied the Facebook habits of 294 students, aged between 18 and 65, and measured two "socially disruptive" elements of narcissism - Grandiose Exhibitionism (GE) and Entitlement/Exploitativeness (EE).

GE includes "self-absorption, vanity, superiority, and exhibitionistic tendencies" and people who score high on this aspect of narcissism need to be constantly at the centre of attention.

They often say shocking things and inappropriately self-disclose because they cannot stand to be ignored or waste a chance of self-promotion.

The EE aspect includes "a sense of deserving respect and a willingness to manipulate and take advantage of others".

The research revealed that the higher someone scored on aspects of GE, the greater the number of friends they had on Facebook, with some amassing more than 800.

Those scoring highly on EE and GG were also more likely to accept friend requests from strangers and seek social support, but less likely to provide it, according to the research.

Carol Craig, a social scientist and chief executive of the Centre for Confidence and Well-being , said young people in Britain were becoming increasingly narcissistic and Facebook provided a platform for the disorder.

"The way that children are being educated is focusing more and more on the importance of self-esteem - on how you are seen in the eyes of others.

"This method of teaching has been imported from the US and is 'all about me'.

"Facebook provides a platform for people to self-promote by changing profile pictures and showing how many hundreds of friends you have. I know of some who have more than 1,000."

Dr Viv Vignoles, senior lecturer in social psychology at Sussex University, said there was "clear evidence" from studies in the US that college students were becoming increasingly narcissistic.

But he added: "Whether the same is true of non-college students or of young people in other countries, such as the UK, remains an open question, as far as I know.

"Without understanding the causes underlying the historical change in US college students, we do not know whether these causes are factors that are relatively specific to American culture... or whether they are factors that are more general, for example new technologies such as mobile phones and Facebook."

Dr Vignoles said the correlational nature of the latest study meant it was difficult to be certain whether individual differences in narcissism led to certain patterns of Facebook behaviour, whether patterns of Facebook behaviour led to individual differences in narcissism, or a bit of both.

Christopher Carpenter, who ran the study, said: "In general, the 'dark side' of Facebook requires more research in order to better understand Facebook's socially bene?cial and harmful aspects in order to enhance the former and curtail the latter.

"If Facebook is to be a place where people go to repair their damaged ego and seek social support, it is vitally important to discover the potentially negative communication one might ?nd on Facebook and the kinds of people likely to engage in them.

"Ideally, people will engage in pro-social Facebooking rather than anti-social me-booking."

Maggie Brown (Author)

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HOW POOR COMMUNICATION LEADS TO DRAMA AND WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT

Remember this site is dealing with YOU in a holistic way not just concerning your outward appearance. To shine on the outside you have to shine from within and that includes how you think and how you interact with others. In other words COMMUNICATION.

Over years using social network sites I've noticed never a day goes past without some drama somewhere and by and large most of the drama is caused by poor communication. 

There is drama caused by some mischief makers you will get them anywhere and these trouble makers delight in getting their kicks out of upsetting and winding others up. I have noticed they love doing this and then disappearing, these types are best ignored for the more attention you give them even negative attention, is still attention, the more they love it. With them don't play the game and they will get fed up and crawl away.

But I would like to blog about the fore mentioned type of drama, poor communication. When we communicate in person we don't just use words, we use our voice expressing tone, we use body language, we gesticulate and we smile, use our eyes, we laugh.  On social network sites what means of communication do we have available to us? we have words, therein lies the problem. Even when we speak the same language say English, we all have different colloquialisms and expressions but to compound the problem further we can be classified into different types, the way we interpret and understand each other.

Some of you may have heard of Neuro linguistic programing NLP for short, and NLP has many uses, but essentially its about the way our brain assimilates information and acts on it and how we can program our brains to use this information to best effect. NLP is a vast subject. I studied it as part of Health Studies at University and put it into practice in my work as a lecturer and as a counsellor to good effect.

The one aspect I want to mention is how we interpret the written word and the classification of different types of personalities.

There are three main types and some sub types and people can be combination of types but by and large there  generally is a dominate type within each of us e.g.

Visuals, who like to think in pictures and diagrams, who prefer to say take in information via diagrams and illustrations, who use the words I see, picture this and various expressions conveying their  dominate visual skills, when they are thinking for example if trying to spell something, you will see them raise their eyes upwards and to the left as if accessing some part up there in their brain, which is actually what they are doing. They love colour and tend to dress flamboyantly.

Auditory types, who think in words, they respond to hearing and learning through the spoken word are good at receiving instructions and work well on the telephone. When they think, you will see them tilt their heads to one side showing an ear and when they are working or studying say like peace and quiet, noise is a distraction to them. They too will use words to express their auditory skills, can you hear me, listen if you want my advice. They are more conservative in appearance

And the Kinesthetic types, these are the touchy feely ones, when they are thinking and concentrating you will see them looking downwards to their abdomen towards their solar plexus. These are the type of people who like to touch things, whether its stroke fabric when buying things and tend to be  shifting position in an audience however slight as they have to work the information in. They will use words conveying feelings and emotions, who like to show affection and will talk about how they feel and can be very empathetic words like I understand, I really feel for you etc.

So what has all this got to do with drama on social network sites, well it is  just showing we take in and assimilate information differently, and we are apt to misconstrue information differently as we do not have rapport with the persons we are trying to communicate with. Its nobody's fault. We can get over this in person as we use or voice and our body language in person so we have more ways to take in understanding, but on here we are limited to just words. If you also bear in mind many of the people we communicate with come from different cultures and English is not their first language you compound the problem further if you do not take all this into consideration.

So want can we do, well by taking time to read carefully what is written and not jump to first conclusions, different cultures will use the same words but with different meanings and look at their use of words, do you think they are visuals if they use the words I see a lot, or are they very emotionally based by using touchy feely words etc.

When you can ascertain and gage what type some one is you can talk the same language as them and gain rapport e.g. if some one is a visual type use the same type of words and expressions mirror them and try and gain understanding and thus rapport. By doing this and just being aware not everyone thinks the same way as you and just because they don't it doesn't make them wrong and you right. Just take a little time to understand and learn to communicate with one another by doing that you can ease the drama that is all to prevalent on social network sites

Maggie Brown (Author)

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